Jumping and living in fear

I waited since February to have the occasion to do this activity. As anyone up there I feel fear, excitement, confusion and many other things. I really was trying to think about different things while doing this. Even when I was not completely sure days before because I was trying to plan my schedule to visit Europe, then I saw how Paris became a zone of War. Yes, war, reading critical views from a variety of experts expressing comments against the use of this word by Francois Holland during his speech but even when I understand the social ideas of French citizens against extreme and aggressive actions towards countries, where terrorists groups are planning or supporting this type of actions, it is impossible to find a weakness in the election of his words. Especially, when it was the right choice when a President confront a critical situation, which requires the manifestation of control, power and promote the feeling of security in France at this time.

I thought in a moment when life could change anywhere, in France, Australia, Lebanon, Ecuador, United States, anywhere, so dramatically, the opportunity to make what you desire should be the most powerful force to make a change. Finding the situation of people in the middle of a concert losing their lives without an understandable reason is a calling to make you feel with the right inspiration to do what you want, not because you are a stubborn, it is only the way of giving a real meaning to life. I thought that was behind the attitude of French citizens for keeping their traditions to enjoy the nights outside. Doing what others try to take from you it is one of the most extraordinary forces of human beings. Nowadays, it looks like it is one of the things that keep us together in communities because we feel the threats against what our beliefs, actions and systems represent.

Undoubtedly, this was the main feeling I had when I watched everything online. A few hours before this massacre begun I was planning to visit some places in this country and other cities in different European countries. My eyes read the words while I was trying to get the situation and the reasons behind these horrendous actions. A few seconds later, I only thought that I could be one of the victims if I had forgotten the idea of planning and I got the option to just pack and leave Australia. Afterwards, I prefer avoiding more information in my mobile or more details the same day. I do not feel a particular interest for watching senseless suffering but it was impossible to ignore the measures for increasing the security in France after the Paris attacks.

It is common to perceive that citizens are not interested in provoking damage or support belligerent actions but when societies face this type of threat, it is impossible to say that they do not have the right to defend their lives. If you see something like it, you only possible response will inspire by the idea of protecting your people, even when it would mean attack everything or everyone threatening your purpose.

After this, I still want to visit France because I really believe nobody should have the right to affect what you plan for your life. There is no reason to let something like this diminish your freedom. Even when feelings of going out and having the best time could feel like something difficult, especially, under these circumstances. I think that the purpose of trying to live your life without letting terrorists actions scared you is the most brave decision towards senseless violence.

I thought watching that situation motivated me to do something that I consider exciting but scaring because it is the only way to inspire yourself of feeling less scared of unknown things. Furthermore when I was not sure if I would be enough strong to control my nervous system while jumping from an airplane I think this will be really interesting as experience. The best part was doing something like this is finding that scared is more a state of mind than other thing but it does not mean that it could not damage more than a response or action.

While I was in the air I appreciate Melbourne from the air one more time, it is a nice place and it had a beautiful sea colour. The first minutes were completely terrifying, you only thought is if the parachute will open, then you think this is ‘insane’, later you scream, you could not listen your voice or anything, the wind transform your face and you just could not believe that –for the first time I am sure of this- “you are in the middle of the nowhere”. When the parachute opened everything gets calm and you enjoy the twists, the view, the colours, and yourselves having an interview about becoming professional instructor. However, it takes at least three week to complete the training to do it by yourself and 500 jumps to become a PRO and enjoy the activity guiding others in the air. If I should have known this, probably I would start earlier because it was really fun. One of those experiences, which reminds you that even in fear, sometimes, you could find the right vision if you could see everything from a different angle. In my case, I only could express that nobody should threat human beings in urban areas for supporting any ideology. No matter how old, how sure or how convinced their beliefs or purposes, it is a crime and no country must tolerate it.



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Journalist. Student of Global Media Communication. Interested in Politics, Economy, Social Media, Technology. Feminist. Like walking, talking and swimming.

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